August 5, 2008
Humor: A handsome man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle; I’m still a virgin.”
“What?” asked the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”
“Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
“Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.
“Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.
“Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.
“Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.
“Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.
“Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.
“Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
“Husband #9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.
“Husband #10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was … well you get the drift. God, I miss him.
“But now that I’ve married you, I’m so excited.”
“Wonderful,” said the husband, “but why?”
“You’re with the ‘GOVERNMENT’… This time I KNOW I’m gonna get SCREWED.”